Affirmations, goodbyes, & self-care

I deserve health, happiness, & to be treated with care and love. I really struggled to sever ties with someone the other day, & I’m still wondering what the future with him would’ve been like. I deserve a non-abusive relationship, even if it seemed like things would get better with him.

Better is yet to come, even if I can’t see it yet.

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read, write, repeat

that’s what i’ve been doing today… reading (books, blogs, tweets, posts) and writing (in a journal, facebook, twitter, and now on my laptop).

i don’t really use my laptop much… the iphone is just so much easier and more mobile. but i also like the feel of the laptop.  neither here nor there though.

i’ve focused a lot lately on advocacy lately.  i’m so tired of people being treated poorly because of who they ARE.. who they love, what they believe, how they look, what they say.

for instance, the shit that my LGBT friends face everyday is disgusting.  i’m often left speechless and downright angry, and i don’t identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender. i can only imagine what goes on in their minds, in their worlds.  i stand with them – as a straight ally, friend, (or a therapist, as some clients identify as LGBT), and advocate.  a friend of  mine said today, “an ally is more than a straight person that supports LGBT folks… a true ally is one who listens, takes the attention away from themselves, loves, and learns.  it’s my hope that an ally is also a safe person.”

{a safe person}

i am thankful for my own safe people… that in the midst of chaos, uphill battles, difficult times, and triggers are [there] for me. not only in those times, but also the lovely, joyous, hilarious times.

and i pray that i will continue to be a safe person for others too.

It’s tough being wide awake when so many are sleeping. Thanks to a daytime nap for that.

Just now I was reminded of the atrocious behavior of Stephan Collins and my stomach is in knots. Perpetrators don’t fit a certain description or look a certain way. They can be moms, dads, siblings, teachers, clergy, neighbors, ANYONE.

I’ve avoided the news about him & his behavior- muted his interviews, closed the CNN app on my iPhone when he’s mentioned, etc. So not too long ago, I read the blog of a famous person and -bam- a story about Collins.

My stomach keeps turning and my heart is racing. Breathe, use your coping skills, you are okay.

Breathe. Use your coping skills. You are okay.

You’re safe.

& to others on my mind tonight, you’re safe too.